On Friday night, I notice a slightly weird smell in the house. Kind of like someone had just cooked ethnic food...or something else. I didn't think much of it and went to bed.
The next morning the smell was still there and a little stronger. We (let's be honest...Colette) keeps our house very clean so I was worried that the pipes might be backed up or a fungus was growing. The smell was strongest by the bathroom that anonymous roommate (AR) and I share. I scrubbed it down hoping the smell would disappear. I emerged from the bathroom and my hopes were dashed.
I knew that it wasn't coming from my bedroom so I opened AR's door and almost lost it. I quickly looked around the room but couldn't see anything but piles of close. Ten seconds later I closed the door and ran into the living room gasping for air.
Saturday afternoon, I called AR and left a message informing her that her room smelled like death. She didn't return on Saturday night. Sunday evening rolled around and I started to worry. Maybe she was dead under the pile of clothes. We sent texts and I tried to call again to make sure she was okay but there was no response.
Sunday night at midnight, just as I was falling asleep, my phone rang. She was in Salt Lake visiting her boyfriend's family all weekend. I asked if it could be garbage or food. She said she was positive it wasn't and thought it was most likely a dead mouse. A DEAD MOUSE. And could I please go in there and check.
Nope. I sure can't. But you may bring your boyfriend or a dog over at your earliest convenience. I slept maybe three hours that night.
She returned at 5:30pm on Monday with her boyfriend and discovered that it was a bag of rice and beans behind her door. Beans and rice that had been there long enough to smell like death.
9 comments:
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Oh my gosh. This kinda reminds me of the time I forgot about a bag of potatoes under my bed long enough for them to ferment. Though, that just took me about .2 seconds before I smelled it, found it, and chose between the decision to make vodka or throw it out.
I had another venting session in my head today. One of these days I'm just going to lose it.
This AR person is unlike anyone I have known. She must be the most interesting person in the world. I have so many questions.
Is she five? Why did she think it was a dead mouse? Why? What led her to believe that might even be an option? Is her boyfriend real? Why was there a bag of rice and beans? Who puts cooked rice and beans in a bag? Doesn't everyone immediately refrigerate or consume perishable food when they get home?
Whenever I hear "dead mouse" I think of poor Gus down in the storage room. Remember him?
This story and everyone's comments made me laugh. Oh my. I feel like there are probably some other good stories not yet told about the AR. And I'd like to hear them. :)
Bwahahaha love this. For the record though, I would do exactly what you did...avoid the mouse.
Who leaves a bag of beans and rice too?
I am looking forward to more AR stories in the future. Please provide!
isrI keep rice and beans in a bag behind my door all the time and they have never end up smelling like dead mouse....oh wait NO ONE KEEPS BAGS OF RICE AND BEANS IN THEIR ROOM!!!
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